Raising a child is hard. I know this from experience and also from talking to other parents. Raising a child who achieves joy and self-esteem is even harder—but it’s worth every single moment of your time and effort! If you’re like me, after having experienced the difficult moments of parenting, you may be wondering how you can help your children build their self-esteem and experience joy instead of guilt.

I’ve learned over the years that there are many ways we can cultivate these qualities in our children without making them feel like we’re against their interests or opinions about things (which can be tricky). So let’s start with something simple: saying yes to joy!

Raising a Child Who Achieves Joy and Self-Esteem

Say yes to joy, and no to guilt.

Guilt is a powerful motivator, but it should be used sparingly. When you make your child feel guilty for something they’ve done or not done, you’re only going to make them feel worse about themselves in the long run. Instead of focusing on what they did wrong or right, try to focus on the things that made them happy and fulfilled.

This can be as simple as saying “I’m so proud of how hard you worked on that project!” instead of “That was such bad behavior!”

If your child has been naughty (or nice), don’t let guilt trip you into punishing them more than necessary—it’ll just make them resentful towards both themselves and their parents! Try keeping things positive by saying something like “I know this wasn’t easy for you but I’m sure glad we got through it.”

Don’t let your anxiety about your child cloud you from what’s happening.

You can’t control everything that happens to your child. They will learn from the experiences they have, and if you’re worried about negative things happening, it’s best to focus on what’s going right in their lives.

For example: If your child is struggling with schoolwork at home but succeeds in all other areas of life (like sports or music), don’t worry about it! It may be because he has an incredible teacher who helps him get better grades than other kids do when they struggle too much with math or English.

Or maybe there are only a few days left before Christmas break starts and so everyone is getting excited about gifts from Santa Claus (and maybe even giving up some stuff themselves). Whatever the reason may be for this behavior pattern—it’s okay! Your job isn’t always about finding reasons why things happen; instead, start looking for ways how we can improve ourselves so that we won’t need any excuses anymore.”

Worry less about what you look like as a mother and more about how you are being a mother.

You are not a perfect parent. You will never be the perfect mother, but you can be a good one.

You may have read somewhere that it’s important to worry less about what your child looks like and more about how they’re doing in school and at home…and then you read another article that tells you it’s okay if your child does not meet certain expectations because children are supposed to make us feel guilty anyway!

These conflicting messages become exhausting; we want them both: all-encompassing guidance from our community leaders (or even just someone who knows) as well as space for self-reflection, forgiveness, and growth without judgment or pressure from others (especially ourselves).

Recognize that every day is different and each moment can bring a new opportunity to be the good parent you want to be.

If your child is struggling with low self-esteem, it’s important to recognize that every day is different and each moment can bring a new opportunity to be the good parent you want to be.

• Don’t worry about what you did yesterday. What matters most is how you respond today—and tomorrow will be another day with its opportunities for growth and change.
• Don’t compare yourself to other parents who have achieved more than you do as a parent (or don’t even bother comparing yourself at all). You’re doing great!

Build loving relationships with your children that support their right to experience their world on their terms and include their interests, talents, and desires.

How can you help your child feel safe, heard, and understood? How do you build loving relationships with your children that support their right to experience their world on their terms and include their interests, talents, and desires?

I believe that the best way to do this is by letting them be themselves. Sometimes we have good intentions when we tell our kids “you can’t” or “you need to,” but what happens when they rebel against us? We may try again in another way, but if this doesn’t work for them either then we’ve lost our connection with them as well. It’s important for parents not only to listen but respond productively when children express themselves creatively (or not).

Let your children see who they are through you and trust that they will use those reflections to build their own self-esteem.

• Let your children see who they are through you and trust that they will use those reflections to build their own self-esteem.
• Give them the freedom to make mistakes, but don’t let them get away with being lazy or disrespectful. If you do, it will reinforce behavior patterns in a child who is used to getting by without trying hard enough for success. You need a child who has confidence in his or her abilities, not one who feels sorry for himself or because failure could mean the end of his hopes and dreams!
• Believe in what you have created together (the family unit) no matter how difficult it seems at times; remember that love always wins out over hatefulness every time!

Raising kids isn’t easy, but it is rewarding, especially if we focus on joyfulness!

You may be surprised to hear that raising children is not easy. But it’s also true that when you choose joyfulness over frustration, you are making a difference in the lives of your kids.

While it’s important to show them how they can be happy and successful, it’s also important not to let their mistakes ruin any experience for them. If they make a mistake, teach them how to learn from it so they can do better next time!

Conclusion

If you’ve found yourself thinking, “I don’t know how to raise my child into a happy, successful adult,” then you’re not alone. But there is hope! I promise that by focusing on the things that make life worth living—like joy and self-esteem—you’ll be raising kids who are strong enough to help others.