Controlling parenting is a parenting style in which parents exert a high degree of control over their children’s lives and make most of the decisions for them.
They tend to micromanage their children’s lives and make decisions on their behalf, often without consulting them or taking their feelings into account.
This parenting style is characterized by a lack of trust in the child’s ability to make good decisions and an excessive need for control.
Signs of controlling parents include:
- Making decisions for their children without consulting them or taking their feelings into account. For example, a controlling parent may choose their child’s friends, activities, and even career paths without considering their child’s own preferences or opinions.
- Being overly critical and not allowing children to make their own mistakes. For example, a controlling parent may constantly correct their child’s behavior and not allow them to learn from their own errors.
- Overprotecting their children, not allowing them to take risks or be independent. For example, a controlling parent may not allow their child to walk to school alone or participate in activities they are interested in because they think it is too risky.
- Not allowing their children to express their own opinions or make their own choices. For example, a controlling parent may always speak for their child in social situations and not allow them to express their own thoughts or opinions.
- Being too involved in their children’s lives, micromanaging their activities and schedules. For example, a controlling parent may insist on accompanying their child to all their extracurricular activities and not allowing them to make their own plans.
- Not allowing their children to form their own identities and make their own decisions. For example, a controlling parent may not allow their child to have their own interests or hobbies that deviate from what the parent wants for them.
- Using guilt, shame, or punishment to control their children’s behavior. For example, a controlling parent may use guilt to make their child feel responsible for their own happiness or use punishment to control their child’s behavior.
- Not allowing their children to have privacy or boundaries. For example, a controlling parent may read their child’s diary or constantly check in on them without respecting their child’s need for privacy.
It’s important to note that controlling parenting can have negative effects on children’s self-esteem, self-worth, and self-efficacy. And it’s vital for parents to be flexible and adapt their parenting style to their child’s needs.
